Quick Hits

Easter's come and gone, but Bun-O-Vision is always in season. The reminder comes from Derek, whose favorites are Titanic and The Exorcist. My vote might be for Kill Bill.

Two newborn Bactrian camels get acquainted at the Chicago Zoological Society's Brookfield Zoo on March 25. (AP/Brookfield Zoo, Jim Schulz)

"Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise."

Alice Walker

Today's Top Story

Cult Members Leave Apocalypse Cave

Bless their simple hearts. They sound like a fun bunch.

Short Shorts

Condensed versions of Thelma & Louise and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre from Propeller TV's ShortFest.

I liked:

• Ur Rinal
• Speed Date
• Frank
• Ebenezer Morgan's Photographic Emporium

Also from Riley.

Handle With Care

This is probably more amusing to people whose luggage isn't currently lost at Heathrow. Those unfortunate souls are likelier to be playing the Crying Game.

From Riley.

I Fell Tower

I should have known. That last post had blague written all over it, but a little digging convinced me that it was legit. Not so. (Interesting story, though.)

The best April fool's joke is the one you unwittingly play on yourself.

Thanks to Terry for disillusioning me. He didn't even gloat.

Today's Top Story

Literally:

THE EIFFEL TOWER TO GET A FANCY HAT FOR HER BIRTHDAY

From Derek.

Shorthand for Dummies

If you had told me 15 years ago that I would have friends in middle age who'd add smiley and winky faces -- unironically -- to their correspondence, I would have scoffed indignantly. Sadly, I would have been wrong. :(

As it turns out, I have a number of correspondents -- accomplished and otherwise mature adults -- who unselfconsciously punctuate their emails like nine-year-old girls. :o

It's not just emoticons that get my goat: I despise those stupid instant-message abbreviations. Just the sight of an lol makes me want to put my fist through the screen. Honestly, wtf? If you're too lazy to type it, you can be sure I don't need to read it.

Now the scourge is spreading beyond the keyboard. I've read of efforts, apparently serious, to allow IM "spelling" in the classroom.

And then there are these people, who probably shouldn't be breeding in the first place. They would do well to heed the experts:

Albert Mehrabian, a psychology professor at the University of California who has researched the impact of irregular names, found that "less attractive characteristics were attributed to individuals with less conventionally spelled names.... Unconventional spelling connoted less masculinity for men and less femininity for women [and] more anxiety and neuroticism were attributed to those with less common names."

I think this guy might be onto something:

John Dunford, the general secretary of the Association of School and College Leaders, said that it was possible that new mothers and fathers had lost the ability to spell forenames.

He added: "Some of it is genuine misspelling; some is parents looking for a unique way to spell a name and some is just carelessness."

Noteworthy Idea

Buy 'em here.