Friday, March 18, 2011

The Late Show

Recent favorites from Sleep Talkin' Man:
"(chuckling) I'm so happy I could shit a puppy."

"Look at them staring at people like that. Your boobs are so obnoxious. Uch."

"Ugh, I know you. You're always on the corner of Fuck-off and Cunt-bag."

"Jesus nipples on ice! I am NOT going shopping for hamster wigs. No!"

"Listen: Some people play Scrabble. Some people play chess. You? You play turd puppets."

"Don't. Don't! Oh, don't exfoliate your labia."

"What I really need now is a whippet, three tubes, and a fuck-off mallet. Then it's go go go!"


The Awakened said...

poor whippet!

Michael Kearns said...

I could also use a "fuck off mallet." That would be so helpful in the office right about now...